I just finished "She's out of Control" by Kristen Billerbeck. Yes, I read a "chick lit" book. It's about this 31 year old girl Ashley who is a lawyer in California and her crazy life as a single lawyer, her singles Sunday school class (they call themselves the Reasons... hahaha) and her crazy love life... As a wonderful man comes after her heart she feels herself starting to fall and is afraid but she finally surrenders and says this:

...I'm still thinking about life. I'm thinking that living out loud means living truthfully. Not just in my faith and deeds but in my emotions. We live in a world where it's safer to protect your heart from disasters... but you know what? The Bible also says to live free of fear, that fear doesn't come from the Lord. I look it up in 1 John, just to make sure, and there is is: 'There is no fear in love, but perfect love drives out fear...the one who fears is not made perfect in love"

[and we all know that emotions spawn from what we are believing... I think she's saying bring your emotions to truth... For example if you are feeling fear,(p.s. I think fear causes us to miss out), investigate that and receive the truth that the Lord is in control...]

So you're free to take that leap of faith: the reality is you ARE out of control it's just a matter of if you acknowledge it or not. It's just a matter of if you acknowledge that God IS in control and you yield to His guidance. He does love you! And as Ashley lets her heart go...

Jumping off the cliff is how you feel the hand of God underneath you.

Moses himself said: "the eternal God is a dwelling place and underneath are the everlasting arms." What are we afraid of? Who better to trust our hearts and lives to than the Everlasting Arms... strong and dependable and eternal. Powerful and loving. We have nothing to hide and our shame does not define us: Jesus Christ does!

It's a vulnerable spot to be in, jumping off a cliff. Maybe crazy to some, in fact, only a fool in love would do it. But oh to love and be loved so much that you can trust Him enough to take the plunge, believing fully that His outstretched arms were there all along. It may look crazy to the world but no one knows us better than our Creator. We have our little secrets, you know. We know each other. I can trust Him because I know His character and boy does He know mine.

This life can hurt and sometimes we try to stop it for fear of failure or just plain fear. We withdraw because we think the 'ouch' is just around the corner. Perfect love drives OUT fear! "...many of life's mysteries are beyond our understanding. God's grace equips us to trust in His sovereign control. Our faith then frees us from wallowing in constant frustration, confusion and self doubt. We can walk in His faithfulness and trust His ways even when they aren't our way" (Steve mcvey)

I pray that God continues to open my heart to Him to the point that I ask no questions but simply follow Him... let Him carry me in fact. No fear because why? Perfect love! I want to continue to fall deeply in love with Him- how fulfilling is that to yield control to the One who is deeply in love with me?! I hope your heart leaps like mine at this pursuit of which we are the recipients!!

Holy, You are Still Holy
Even when the darkness surrounds my life
Sovereign, you are still Sovereign
Even when confusion has blinded my eyes

Lord, I dont deserve your kind affection
When my unbelief has kept me from your touch
I want my life to be a pure reflection of your Love

So I come into your chambers and I dance at your feet Lord
you are my savior and i'm at your mercy
all that has been in my life until now
Belongs to you, for you are still holy.

holy you are still holy even when i dont understand your ways
sovereign, you are still Sovereign even when my circumstances dont
change
Lord i dont deserve your tender patience when my unbelief has kept me from
your truth
i want my life to be a sweet devotion to you

I love these lyrics (rita springer again)
Showing the value of His presence. Nothing can change who He is... it may feel like He is not good, but He is and that's our security in know the character of God. He is the hope we have.

This is your Life- Your one and only life. And He wants to be a part of every bit of it. It's His after all- He gives each moment for enjoyment of you for His glory. There's a beautiful tension there- it's called relationship- communication is the food of it.

Lord by your mercy expose my unbelief so that I don't miss another second of you! Make me weak in my mind so that I may live in constant awareness of the heartbeat of your spirit!

i remember when rita springer came to encounter and in her lyrics she changed a few words which made them all the more applicable:

i want the joy of the Lord to come down, i want the joy of the Lord to fall down, i want the joy of the Lord in my life
i want the joy of the Lord to lift me ... to change me... in my life...

...and it's time we started DANCING over all these graves
and it's time we give you , o my God, the highest praise
it's time to lift our voice; we're gonna beg for the blessing to fall...

and the cool part:
...and it's time we started DANCING OVER ALL THIS JUNK!

graves = junk.... things that bring death is just the trash of sin and distraction (idols) in our lives and satan will do anything to convince us to think on our circumstances, our selves and miss the whole point:

we MUST RELY on BELIEVE in DEPEND on
JESUS
for EVERYTHING!

I want the JOY of the LORD to change me and move me, not the happiness of cool THINGS, not because things are going "my way" to drive me and me what lifts my spirit. I want Jesus to do that. (Now of course there are millions of ways He can do this and you can recognize it's from Him) But is He not in all things?? Give Him the glory and credit!

And if He is in all things, what about the bad that happens to His children? I think He's in those as well. Have you read Job? ("consider my servant Job...") You are not a slave to your stuff... it doesn't have to control you. People do not have power over you- you are controlled by the Spirit of the Living God who moves in and through you!



Proverbs 20
30Blows that wound cleanse away evil; strokes make clean the innermost parts.
Proverbs 21
1The king's heart is a stream of water in the hand of the LORD; he turns it wherever he will.

The Spirit of God is a river of Life inside of you!
The Spirit of God is purifying and life changing. Live in Him. He is reality. Just a moment in His presence makes all other things seem so small. And we carry His presence with us always- it's just a matter of acknowledging it.


Junk is meant to be stomped on, danced over, and lived above.
Who wants to wallow around in it? You and I don't have to do that , you know!
Is that not why we enjoy worship so much? We escape the junk- We may even forget about it for awhile. Because in His presence is the fullness of joy. It's not the worship that does it in and of itself. It's HIM.

In HIS PRESENCE is the fullness of joy. And He is always present. We just have to choose to live there! Seated in Christ at the right hand of the Father. At rest. Rest and peace for the soul is found only in the finished work of Christ at the Cross- it's done.
And that's victory. True victory for this life and the one to come.

"...What is needed, then, is to see God in everything, and to receive everything directly from His hands, with no intervention of second causes (such as other human beings). And it is just to this that we must be brought, before we can know an abiding experience of entire abandonment and perfect trust. Our abandonment must be to God, not to man, and our trust must be in Him,not in any arm of flesh, or we shall fail at the first trial" (Hannah whitall smith)

Not only is there joy in His presence but there is power... Power to live by faith alone and to declare that He is better and I'd rather have Him than anything here. Believing this frees us to accept all things that happen as things from Father meant for good because HE is good.

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble. Therefore will not we fear, though the earth be removed, (have you felt your world fall apart??) and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though the earth be removed, and though the mountains be carried into the midst of the sea; though the waters thereof roar and be troubled; (aren't there plenty of storms to go around??) though the mountains shake with the swelling thereof.
I will say of the Lord, he is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in Him will I trust. Surely He shall deliver thee from the snare of the fowler, and from the noisesome pestilence. He shall cover thee with His feathers, and under His wings shalt thou trust. His truth shall by thy shield and buckler. Thou shalt not be afraid for the terror by night, nor for the arrow that flieth by day,nor for the pestilence that walketh in darkness, nor for the destruction that wasteth at noonday...(Psalm 46)

Is He not powerful? Is He not in control? Does He not love you dangerously and passionately?

I believe He does. Just ask Him. Everything that comes to you is an opportunity to dive in to the treasure of Jesus that awaits you.

Don't let your mind deceive you. Don't try to outsmart Him- you can't. Logic distracts but faith rescues and restores and transforms you in your mind who you already are in spirit: a new creation for the glory of an indescribable God.

I am just gonna repost something from the summer that I need to chew on again... More to come:) This lesson is taking on another face for me, but here's the first verse.

Monday, July 25, 2005
How you livin'? The SPIRIT of the GOSPEL
Are you living out of your IDENTITY in Christ or on your old thought patterns?Wanna know how to transform your mind? Put on Christ! He has given you a new heart (Ez. 36:26) that's alive to God. You are no longer a slave to sin. You are a slave to RIGHTEOUSNESS: that's your nature... your identity. Jack Taylor said something to the effect of this: being weak in your mind makes the truths of your identity precious. Oh wow, how the Lord has made this truth to me! The more I surrender what I think about things and ask the Lord to reveal the reality of the gospel... well, HE does it! The truth of who I am in Christ sets me free. One thing that gets me a lot is a judgmental mindframe, but the more I recognize that I am totally accepted in Christ the more I no longer have to think of ways to form my own sense of worth...Ultimately by belittling others! YUCK! He has given me total worth and acceptance and I know longer have to live out of my mind. I live out of my Spirit... My identity... And then my mind is transformed by that. Then, when a judgmental thought comes "I am so much more intimate with God than she is" I can take it captive: because the word says that we are not to judge and that we are ALL accepted not by what we do... And God sees the heart (I know I cannot) and ultimately because I am a child of God, and a righteous one at that. So since a righteous person does not think like that, then who's thought was that? Not mine! I refuse to take that as my own and reject this lie; Knowing that "she" is loved and accepted without condition. Knowing that none of us can get any closer or intimate with God that we already are, that thought is a lie, and I refuse to puff my own opinion up of myself (thinking I'm 'better than') to feel good. That's a cheap quick fix. Father offers wholeness and love regardless of my understanding of it or not! Praise God- I am not a judgmental person but a loving person in Christ. So how am I livin? Well, we are similar to a temple on the old testament days. Looking from the outside you can see the walls (like our physical body: plain to the eye) and the outer courts- what makes up our body or our "members" then comes the Holy Place (this is like our soul: our mind will and emotions and what we operated out of before Christ gave us His life. This part is being progressively renewed to truth and changed/sanctified) and the innermost part is the Holy of Holies, separated by a curtain or veil where the Lord resides (this is like our Spirit- where we receive our identity at salvation).The problem is when we were born our spirit was dead to God- we had no other option but to live out of the soul (out of the strength of our minds and how we perceived the world from day one- as twisted as that view may be). We use logic and our own will to make life work. Once we become saved our spirit is reborn (we are a new creation) and we now have Christ as our source. We no longer have to figure out life on our own! He is all sufficient! The sad thing is we had become so comfortable living in and out of our mind we don't realize the freedom that's behind that curtain. Christ, the High priest, actually came to tear that curtain and invite us to intimacy/union/oneness with Him. But our free will (he's not gonna force us to love him or seek him) may continue to live/find life out of the mind. Thank goodness he is faithful to break us, to bring us to dependence on Him where we see that the mind is not sufficient but he is all sufficient. (Some it may take longer than others, sadly b/c some of us are really good at using our own thinking.)Good news: He has torn down the barrier by totally paying the price for our sin (no debts owed by you or me) and giving us His life (residing in our spirit: our own Holy of Holies) and renewing our mind to the truth of our identity. THEN our mind is transformed and we live life out of the Spirit... The truths of our identity penetrate our thinking and we can surrender to HIM, knowing that just when I can't figure it out on my own, He is enough and He gives me His perspective--His godly wisdom, and Christ is my ultimate focus. He has given me all I need in Him. My TRUE identity. My TRUE nature. Progressively, my thinking becomes more in line with His, more often my feelings line up with the truth and I stand changed: More like Christ, in whom Father finds great delight- living in His rest and peace and enjoying eternity today. What a gift the gospel is! Who else but God could give a heart message that changes you daily, frees you daily, and ultimately LOVES you daily and meets every need in Christ Jesus?!!