In the few days i have been here i have seen and heard story after story and many testimonies of God's faithfulness. He is ALL ABOUT drawing people into intimacy with Himself, and he does that in many ways. I have heard about deliverance from demons, (and that makes HIS spirit even more REAL, and was actually in the office when one occured down the hall), deliverance from physical illness when truth was applyed to a lie, and the lifting of a hard calloused heart made that way by years and years and years of someone living the Christian life in his own strength. Gosh, He is real and in everything and working in everything and no doubt about he works ALL ALL ALL things for the good of those who love him and are called according to His purpose amen!

I went on a walk with a lady named Renee who has been teaching us and she lives right around the corner from me. She told me this story, which again shows the amazingness of God:
"My grandaughter who was 3 1/2 at the time was so pumped about dance lessons. We had her in the car and her mother went inside to talk to the teacher and I was sitting in the car with her. I hear this little voice say 'Mimi, i ask Jesus in my hawt (heart) today' Oh honey you did? That is wonderful! How did you do it? 'I just pway(pray) and ask Him in my hawt' Wow sweetie! So her mom gets back in the car and i have her tell her mother and then it's time to drop her off at the lesson. She says 'i want a sip of my dwink and den(then) i wanna pway. ok. deeahw(dear) jesus, take my 'fwaid(afraid) away jesus when i go to dance, if i fall or teachuhw(teacher) is not dehrw(there) i love you amen'

is that incredible or what?! how often to we live in fear and take it upon ourselves to muster up courage. HE is courage and HE is the answer. period. and if he has to use a 3 year old to humble us and show us that then so be it. in her mind jesus has all the power in the world in every situation even the seemingly small stuff. what an incredible example of dependence is that!?

Lord Jesus! Let me be like a child! Unquestioning and trusting without an ounce of doubt because you are more than capable. Thank You Jesus for your word today and how you pursue us in so many ways. I love you and thank you for loving me without condition. Thanks for rest. Thanks for you!

I was jogging tonight and just thinking on the Lord and how he is so real. It may have been the Charlotte air, humid and thick, and the fact that my tshirt weighed a couple pounds since I had sweat so much, or maybe, just maybe Jesus Christ is just that real. Maybe, just maybe (ok HE IS ) the Holy Spirit is that tangible and that available. He's a person! He's my life blood flowing in and through me! Now THAT is someone I can trust and believe in. I found myself chugging up the hills of the golf course saying I believe I believe I believe.

Jesus wrote on my heart and spoke clearly to me through a time of brokenness how HE is my companion. Well, let's add another attribute: He is a guide. He is THE guide. HE is the ONLY guide for my life and yours and that frees me up. As some know I cannot make decisions. I cannot decide what I want on the menu, what I want to do, or where I want to go. But maybe that's just because I was trusting myself to make the decision and not him. ANYTHING not done in faith is sin says Romans, and in everything we do we can either to through the life of Christ or our self strength, from typing on this computer to preaching the word. So i make (or should I say He makes) the decision believing that it's Him, this person that knows best and is trustworthy and that lives and dwells in me. Wow. Gosh, He is a real being and I can enjoy eternity today. 1 John 5 is an incredible chapter about Christ life. We so often think that eternity begins when we physically die, but NO! NO NO NO! It begins NOW with our spiritual death on the cross where we died with Christ. We died and were raised to NEW life in him. Our old life no longer exists, so His past becomes OUR past and His future is our future. He is not bound by time. We exist at the right hand of our Father in Christ where He is interceding for us. Notice He's seated, resting because the work is FINISHED! What would our lives be like if we always lived out of those truths?! Incredible. Susan wrote out this verse that I think enhances the idea:

"For thus says the High and Lofty One Who inhabits eternity, whose name is
Holy: 'I dwell in the high and holy place, with him who has a contrite and
humble spirit, to revive the spirit of the humble, and to revive the heart of
the contrite ones'" -Isaiah 57:15

This is Jesus! This is truth about him prophesied before he even came on earth but the cool thing about eternity is there is no time frame. Jesus created us knowing we would betray and hate and kill him, but he still loves us to die for us while we were still sinners, enemies of God, children of wrath, He RESCUED us. Because of CHRIST we have a revives spirit alive to him if we will humble/die to ourselves/GIVE UP and let Him live through us. He revives our hearts, that is he sanctifys us, frees us, and transforms us in His mercy and grace. That's what he does, in fact, that's WHO HE IS! Him alone! He alone can give us life. It's hit me like a ton of bricks. I pray it hits you too... only the Holy Spirit has the power to reveal it and I pray in His mercy that it will be so. AMEN!

So I am sitting in a little starbucks eavesdropping on a guy who is discpling another. He said something that just kind of hit me b/c spiritual gifts have been coming up a lot lately around me. The disciple-ee was asking about tongues and was saying he is open to it and brought up how Paul said 'if i speak with the tongues of angels but have not love' and the disciple-r said a great statement: "So many people are caught up in the power of God but people are transformed by the love of God" I am sure i am ruining the quote but this is not to say that God isn't powerful: he is this and to be feared!!! But also: think how central love is. Think how necessary it is to experience in order to build [any kind of] a relationship! It really hit me - this power, these spiritual gifts are all the children (you know the products, like if 2 people love each other they usually give birth after a 'sequence of events') of love! I remember that old hymn/Mcdonalds commercial for the special olympics:

Love lifted me, love lifted me, when nothing else could help love lifted me!!

He made this point: How much MORE power does it take to consistently love people than to speak in tongues... I there are a lot of tongue-speakers who probably struggle to love people much more... Why not aspire to love? THAT takes dependence! Loving is central - Relationship is key!

It's where it all started! When a man knows he is loved he can function- He really rises to his full potential in Christ when he receives the unfailing abounding love of God. We talked about today how man has those God-given needs (notice what acronym it makes...) and we will do anything to meet those needs to be:
Loved
Accepted
Worth something
Secure

LAWS.. and we find ourselves bound again, but what a joy it is to be a bondslave of Christ. Totally surrendered (i.e. giving up any form of trying to meet these needs through ourselves or others, flat on our faces with palms up ready to RECEIVE, to ABIDE, to DRAW in faith the love of the Lord who freely and abundantly gives it) and resting in His lap. Any other way of meeting these needs is bondage to sin and death. Romans 14:23 says anything not from faith is sin: Wow!

SO we have this love RELATIONSHIP with a Savior and a father in heaven and He is our source. And guess what? Jesus is a person! Do you know him like that?? Do I know him like that?! I want to! I want to know this person who lives inside of me.

I got here today and am in a class with a girl my age with quite a different life than mine, a guy who has studied much religion was raised baptist got confirmed catholic at 20 and is now 28 back to hear about GRACE, and baptist minister who is mostly in charge of pre-marital counseling but wants to counsel with grace life and another pastor from canada who is actually a missionary/seminary teacher in Ukraine. His wife will join us in a couple of weeks b/c she has already been through the training. Wow what a diverse group and how much are we gonna learn? I am already sensing how i bank each day on familiar surroundings and being comfortable to make life work for me. That is not living by faith- That is not living in victory- I want to be fully fully dependent on him and I know I am about to be incredibly humbled even more. Get ready as the Lord continues to free us from exchanging our self-life for HIS life!

It was funny that I found myself in this office with these people (brothers and sisters in Christ, mind you) feeling awkward and wanting to hide a little bit. But wait! I am beautiful! He has made me with incredible treasures that when I let them out reveal qualities of himself. HOw refreshing it is to be reminded again my need for him and the freedom from things as dumb as awkwardness. And i digress to the FACT that the person of Jesus is in me. We have a deepening love relationship and only HE is the answer. If i need peace, or love, or joy i dont pursue those things but pursue Him because he IS love, he IS joy, he IS the peace. Yep, He IS the answer!!!!! Its just a matter of if i identify with him or myself. Dang, he is so much better!